I used her journaling as a jumpstart to mine.
I also used a template by Scrapping with Liz and a kit by Tracie Stroud Designs, called Tomorrow's yesterdays.
Time. It keeps on going. When I was young I thought it ticked by so incredibly slowly. Waiting for my birthday, waiting for a holiday trip seemed to take years instead of weeks. Now I realize that the kids are growing up way too fast. Honestly 2 of them already taller than me! Slow down, hesitate or even just stop for a little while.
Sometimes I’d love the chance to turn back the hands of time, to go back to my wedding day, to not apply that white eye shadow as concealer. To when the boys were young, small, those rosy warm slept on cheeks, to sniff that scent in deeply and to watch them toddle and run away from me. To those days that time seemed to drag, those days when I’d get nothing done, when I was so looking forward to the time they’d be bigger, older, more able to do for themselves, or the ultimate for them to all be in school and for me to have some time to myself, to read a book or meet a friend for coffee.
I think back to when I really was young and thin, not just that thing I say when people aim a camera in my direction. The smile lines and dimples that are wrinkles now. The body that is slowly succumbing to the good food we eat and the force of gravity.
Time keeps marching on, our oldest nearly finished school, his last few exams ahead and then his driver’s test, next month, then on to Uni next year. It seems like not that long ago it was my driver’s test, I was nervous and passed second time around on the 22nd of November (was it really 1984?) He is such a man now, I can rest my head on his shoulder, his smell is that of men’s deodorant, not flings, sticky suckers and marie biscuits smeared all over his cheeks. Stubble covers those self-same cheeks. the middle one leading his clan in modern warfare 2, me not giving him enough credit for that. This boy man who needs to be reminded to apply deo, to do his chores and willingly helps his sister, whether it is downloading songs onto her brand new cell phone or Afrikaans homework. She is growing so fast now too. I wonder if I’ll be the shortest in the family soon. She is growing in beauty as I am aging.
Time can be relentless, however family and these relationships are eternal. If I have to grow old then there is no-one that I would rather spend these years with. Us both with tighter pants and wrinkles and getting older – together, just where we want to be.
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